Thoughtful.

I want to blog more I really do but to be honest its just to complain. Seriously complaining is one of the best things Im good at. Want to know what my favorite thing is to complain about?! Other people complaining! Yeah it makes no sense. Im sure I drive Daniel crazy most days but he know how I am and says he loves me no matter what. Which Im thankful for.
Lately everything and almost everyone bugs me! Like seriously irritates me. This even includes myself. I dont know whats wrong with me. Im guessing its the birth control making more moody then I already am and Im a very moody person to start off with. For example a lot of people come to me with their problems. Why? I dont know its always been like this. And usually Im really sensitive and say things like "oh it will be ok." But what am I saying lately? "Thats a stupid reason to be sad." "Suck it up and deal with it." "It your choice to change it." Yeah Im not very nice lately.
Mainly I think its cause lately Ive been thinking about how people arent very accountable for their own choices. Everyone always love to blame someone else for the way they live or something they did. For example Halloween this year. I saw tons of people say "Utah is stupid. Halloween is Sunday not Saturday." "Stupid Mormons ruin everything." Ok for one, Mormons have nothing to do with this! I hate when people blame my religion cause they think its so wrong. Two just cause some people decided to celebrate on Saturday cause that was their choice doesnt mean you have too. I mean there isnt a law saying, No celebrations on Sunday in Utah. Live your own life people and take charge of it and stop blaming other people.
Sorry I just needed to get this stuff out and if I said it on Facebook. I would get attacked and thats not what I want. I just want to say my opinion. I dont care if you agree or not. Thats why its my opinion.
I know I need to stop complaining but like I said its obviously one of my favorite pass times. I think its cause right now this point in time. Life sucks! Plain and simple. I did not think I would ever be where I am now. Where we can hardly pay the bills. We need money for car tires and registration. Christmas is coming up and Im positive its not going to look pretty. Its just stressful you know. People tell me all the time I just need Faith and the Lord will take care of us. But to be honest I dont think I have any. But mostly that is my own fault. I dont pray, read scriptures, go to church or attend the temple like I should. I know I should do these things but I just dont. I know that makes me a horrible person. I feel like cause of the way I act the Lord is not giving me and my family the blessings we need. Is that silly of me? Maybe. I know I need to change the way I am. But for some reason I never do. Its like losing weight. I hate myself but I dont do anything to change it. Like I said before life sucks! But like I heard tons of times before there is always a rainbow after the rain. I sure hope so cause right now its a hurricane.
Once again sorry about this post. Its horrible I know but I needed to get it out. Like my Daily Gem that I get in my email every day said today. "Turn to the Lord. Exercise all of the faith you have in Him. Let Him share your burden. Allow His grace to lighten your load." -Donald L. Hallstrom. It true! Now if only I can do that.